Well, this post is not about the meaning of the phrase commonly know. It’s about being those friends who wear a mask in front of you. It’s about those friends who let you set high expectations on receiving love and kinship. It’s about those friends who are the reason for many people losing faith in humanity and can’t trust anyone anymore…
Givers need to set limits because takers rarely do.. The feeling of being used is something everyone goes through at some point of their life, though everyone’s experiences aren’t the same.
You know when you are ready to do so much for someone , or when you are so willing to be a helpful and kind person. So willing to be that one person who everyone can go to when they have problems and advice. But don’t you need somebody as well. They say that when giving, you shouldn’t expect anything in return… But is it right to drain everything out of a person? Give a part of you to everyone you meet without getting anything to replace what you lost? Won’t that then at some point leave you…. Empty….?
I have always been at a loss in that field. I have always had friends who used me for their materials needs and rarely wanted me for anything else. I have had people only talk to me when necessary. I have been ignored when their task and necessities have been fulfilled. I don’t think I know what is is to really have a friend to rely on because…… I don’t know if it I will be worth it.
When you get a fire going, you have to keep adding logs or paper to keep it burning, but if it’s only one person who does the work while the others just take in the warmth and light without doing anything, after while it will extinguish. After all how much can one person do? You are only human. You spend so much of your energy in a relationship, but if the effort isn’t both ways, it fades after sometime.
I am fearless, because I have been afraid. I am strong because I have been weak, I am wise because I have been fooled. It’s been a slow press but it’s small steps that lead to one big beautiful journey. You will get their. You will tumble, You will scratch yourself. There will be tears and there will be frustration. There is only one thing to keep in mind . Keep going
Don’t be a friend with benefits to anyone. Don’t be a friend filled with innocence. Don’t be a friend who is naive. Don’t be a friend who can’t stand up for her self.
Be a friend with kindness but a strong will. Be a friend who loves but not that it consumes her. Be a friend who cares but not with all within her. Be the best version of you , and if that is possible only by being alone then so be it. Being on your own is better than wrong company. You should not have to rip yourself to keep others whole..